all the things you wish your parents said to you

hello new followers! so happy to see you here. thanks to kelly oxford, orlando soria, and lynn chen and other cool cats who recommended my substack to you. if you aren’t subscribers to their newsletters already HIGH recommend.

And now life update: i’m starting a new live comedy show (that i hope will become a podcast for all to hear)! it’s called SELF HELP ME: a competitive self-care comedy show and it’s happening IN LOS ANGELES, WEDNESDAY, APRIL 5TH! 7:30pm at Dynasty Typewriter, one of the best comedy venues in LA. tell your LA friends. expect to laugh, learn and love…or is it live laugh love dangit! you know what i mean. tickets and info ALWAYS at jennyyang.tv. (ticket link here)

---

did y’all see Daniel Kwan’s speech for Best Director at the Oscars? hoooooo my goodness when i tell you how i CUH-RIED. Kwan, the Asian half of the directing duo The Daniels, accepted his Oscar for directing Everything Everywhere All At Once (EEAAO) by including a VERY special message to his son.

Daniel Kwan's message to his son Gio

i highly recommend that you watch his entire speech here and then come back to me.

i mean, i’ve cried while watching nearly ALL of the speeches given by the EEAAO crew during awards season (look up the speeches for their Golden Globes, their Indie Spirit awards wins. PHEW.) BUT THIS ONE…GOT. ME.

Kwan used a peak moment of his life on this massive world stage to tell his son that he doesn’t expect his son to win an Oscar like him because, HE WILL LOVE HIM NO MATTER WHAT! AUUUGHHHHHHHHHHHH.

WHO DOES THAT????? is this a new standard for successful loving parents everywhere? DO OUR IMMIGRANT PARENTS NEED TO TAKE NOTES????

what are all the things you wish YOUR parents said to you? this is for those of us who didn’t get to hear what we needed to become emotionally healthy, well-adjusted adults. i didn’t want to keep all that money i spent on therapy anyways! okay?

it wasn’t until well into my adulthood before i realized i could TEACH my parents to say the things i needed to hear. for instance, i always wanted my mom to say “I LOVE YOU” so I MADE her do it hahah. i wrote about it in a previous substack here.

so here’s a completely arbitrary not-so-thought-out list of things you wish your parents said to you:

1. i love you no matter what.

2. it’s okay. change your hair. i know you’re just trying to fit in.

3. school is hard. i know this is a new culture. just try your best.

4. i don’t care what you do for work. if you’re happy then i’m happy.

5. i know you love the family and want to help us. you also need to live your life.

6. it’s okay to relax sometimes. don’t feel bad about it.

7. be helpful to the world and find the simple joys in life that don’t rely on your job or your relationships.

8. maybe get that tattoo?

9. sex is fun. have at it.

10. sure you almost murdered someone but i’m your ride or die.

okay you get it. what would YOU love to hear from your parents? or would have loved to hear from them when you were growing up? GIVE ME YOUR FANTASIES BELOW SO WE CAN ALL HEAL OUR INNER CHILDREN lol.